I admit, conversation with a pregnant woman makes for a tricky state of affairs. For some reason, the social norms that usually apply have no bearing anymore for some people. If you are one of these...try to consider the mental/emotional fragility of the audience by avoiding the following:
1. Try not to flatten yourself against the wall when she walks by.
2. As fascinating as it is, do not share your labor story from hell.
3. Don't ask, "are you sure you aren't having twins?" -- hello?!?!
4. As much as you think you know about everything, don't be the pregnancy police. Avoid asking, "should you be eating/drinking/doing that?"
5. Husbands, don't ask "are you really going to eat that whole [insert pie/box of donuts/side of beef]. Don't make a fat joke. Don't make a fat joke. Don't make a fat joke.
6. Don't say, "You look ready to pop, I can't believe you still have [insert timeframe] to go!"
7. For pete's sake, is it really your business to ask "was this planned?"
8. Avoid calling maternity leave "vacation".
9. Try not to make every conversation about pregnancy.
10. Don't make the first thing you say, "how are you feeling?" -- do you really want to know?
8 comments:
Oh no! Don't tell me people have said/done all those things to you! Some people...
Can we add one more to the list? "No Touching!" Ick! I don't touch your belly, you don't touch mine! Does this happen to you? I hear you about lack of ettiquette.
Amen Rach!
I have heard more horror stories in the last month than ever in my life. For some reason people feel inclined to share. My favorite occurred yesterday when someone at work said that I could bleed to death in a matter of minutes and most likely lose my child if I wasn't careful. ? Hello? Does that seem like an appropriate thing to say to a woman in an emotional state already? Needless to say- I have been a lot more careful today. Whatev.
Also would like to add- Stop the advice random strangers. Sure- you think you are being nice but I really don't care about how your epidural has prevented autism or that bananas helped your baby sleep.
Whoosh! I feel better now. Thanks for the post! How therapeutic!
what kind of insensitive husband would make a fat joke, that's just rude....
Oh Rach, don't sweat it. Consider this the perfect time to actually say what you normally just want to say. Mean preggies are totally forgivable. When someone flattens against the wall, jab em with an elbow as you pass (they're obviously expecting something). Someone shares a hellish labor story, just say "that must have happened because you're a bad person". Husband asks if you're going to eat the whole thing, make him wear it (unless you actually do want to eat the whole thing, in which case you can resort to calling him a "little, little man"). You get the picture. And, if nothing else comes to mind, just pretend you're Dad and simply say "You're an idiot..." to whomever you please. That baby bump is like a "Get Out Of Jail Free" card for your mouth.
Love this post! And love Katie's comments. Thanks for sharing. Hey Rach, I am hoping to come out to Pittsburgh to see my brother-in-law's family sometime next spring or summer. Who knows. I hope we can come see you and your handsome baby too :)
Oh man...I better prepare myself for those comments when I'm pregnant. I love the "radiant" comic :)
Ha! I love that! I can only hope people aren't that dumb when I'm pregnant- sorry if that's been the case for you!
Post a Comment